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"By the way, I - I'm unembarrassed to tell you - I'm not embarrassed to tell you [those mean the same thing, nimwad] - that I did not watch the Democrat debate last night [that's Democratic debate, asswipe, learn some god-damned grammar - and wait - what? you're a candidate for the presidency and you didn't even watch the debate between the people you're running against? you should be fucking embarrased, you dillweed] , but - but I am told, uh, that Sen. Obama made, uh, the statement that if al-Qaeda, uh, came back to Iraq after he withdraws, after the American troops are withdrawn, then he would send military troops back [as opposed to those non-military troops, one presumes] if al-Qaeda established a base in Iraq. [no, you aging douche, that's not what he said - maybe you should start doing some of your own fucking research - like watching the damned debates; i realize you are of the generation that finds remote controls unutterably challenging, but you couldn't at least get an aide to TiVo the fucking thing?] I have some news - al-Qaeda is in Iraq. [poor soul, he always looks so chuffed when one of his lines gets a laugh - even if it's based on an out and out fabrication] Al-Qaeda: it's called "al-Qaeda in Iraq". [um, no, fruitbat - "al-Qaeda in Iraq" is called "al-Qaeda in Iraq"; "al-Qaeda" is just called "al-Qaeda" - they're two separate organizations - and al-Qaeda in Iraq only fucking exists because of reckless bombheads like you - who the hell is briefing you? have you been paying any attention at all to the past four or five years of history?] And my friends, uh, they wouldn't - if we left, they wouldn't be establishing a base - they wouldn't be establishing a base [come on, John you can make it to the end of this sentence...] , they'd be taking a country [foundation, Senator? or did you just pull this scenario out of your withered ass? do you even know how powerful al-Qaeda in Iraq is? oh, no, that's right: you don't even know what the fuck al-Qaeda in Iraq is; forget it, let's just cut to the 'No surrender'] . And I'm not going to allow that to happen, my friends [come, man, you can do it] - I will not surrender [ there we go - close, anyway] - I will not surrender to al-Qaeda! [you won't? um, aren't you the guy that surrendered to the North Vietnamese during your illustrious military career? or were you just bored at that point with crashing so many of our planes?]  You know, maybe Obama could beat this guy - he must have the IQ of a potato. Then again, Obama wouldn't be running against McCain, he'd be running against the GOP propaganda machine, their 527s, the right-wing blogosphere, and the entire media establishment. Maybe they should just tell their ancient candidate to shut the hell up and let them get on with smearing the opposition... Tags: moron majority, political diversion
humour:  what am i doing here?
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President Bush's State of the Union address was most interesting for its omissions. First, one word that wasn't uttered (apart, of course, from "surge") was "Katrina". Trent Lott, for one, can't have been any too pleased about that. Nor could a lot of southern constituents who might have been affected and are still suiffering. Okay, the Bush administration probably thinks most of Katrina's victims are suffering from racial inferiority and are, therefore, negligible - so that may just have been an innocent miscalculation. But did any of you who managed to stay awake through the speech notice that there were also no sops for the religious right? No "right to life", no gay marriage, no abstinence programs, no "activist judges", no war on drugs - no family values. Is it just that the Bush administration doesn't need the fundamentalist vote to win another election? Was this just a big "fuck you" to the dupes that formed a core constituency for five years? If so, I'd like to add my own "fuck you, you witless dillweeds, you put this underachieving criminal in power - may all your hustlers turn to blackmail and all your children be drawn to bestiality". Tags: moron majority, politburo
humour:  pensive
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Courtesy of ABC affiliate KTRK TV (and ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) travelsizedoug), this entertaining story: Mother upset over porn in brand new DVD player
by Jessica Willey
3/30/06 - CLEVELAND, TX - A Cleveland area mother is outraged and offended after getting more than what she paid for at a local Wal-Mart store.
Shelley Bettis say she's now forced to answer questions she was not ready to answer because her children saw things they were too young to see. She bought a DVD player, but also got pornography.
Bettis and her three children just wanted to watch Bambi II Tuesday afternoon, but before Shelley could load the DVD in the new Apex player she had just bought, something else popped up on the screen, and it was a far cry from Bambi.
"I don't even want to tell you what I saw," said Bettis.
Already inside the player, Shelly says, was a DVD. The label was so graphic that we can't even show it to you. The material on it is pornography. |
From the sound of this woman, I'm not so sure she could tell us what she saw. But this already strikes me as a bit bogus. A new DVD player with a disc inside set to some sort of autoplay and already cued up to a graphic sex scene? I seriously doubt it. If this is actually true, I wish my porno disks could automatically leap to a money shot, bypassing all of the FBI warnings and trailers and menus and studio logos and credits and "exposition". As this was a labelled disc (and not a home-burned bit of entertainment), are we to believe that a bottom-of-the-line DVD player has the ability to jump to a scene mid-sex-act simply by plugging the thing in? Pull the third one. "I was floored," she said. "I felt my heart hit the ground that my children had to see that. I was disgusted."
All three of her children, the youngest just eight years old, saw the first few seconds of the DVD before Shelley lunged for the player to turn it off. Thirteen-year-old Taylor watched sex acts she didn't even know about.
"It's very gross," said Taylor. "I saw body parts I've never seen before." |
There are body parts that a thirteen-year-old has never seen? This is a girl who's probably been menstruating for a year or so and she's had that little sex ed? What kind of household is this? But wait a minute. These four people saw "the first few seconds" of video before Wonder Woman leapt across the room in a single bound and killed it - yet they saw sex acts, plural? Sure, lady. In "the first few seconds", I'm surprised they saw body parts, plural. Shelley bought the $34 player at a Cleveland Wal-Mart and says the box it came in had not been tampered with.
In a statement, Wal-Mart apologizes and says, "We are thoroughly investigating the matter at this time."
No one at Apex, the manufacturer, returned our calls.
In a home where the focus is on faith and morals, the wrong purchase, Bettis says, stole her children's innocence.
"For them to see what they seen, it's not right," she said. |
If you ask me, it's about bloody time something was done to their "innocence" (or what we used to call ignorance). If you continue asking me, I'd say that being raised by a woman who can't even speak her first language properly is probably far more damaging than a few seconds worth of people making love. That ain't raght. Maybe it's just the grim images conjured by this home "where the focus is on faith and morals", but this whole thing reminds me of one of Piper Laurie's more over-the-top scenes from Carrie: "Witch! Got Satan's Power! I should've given you to God when you were born, but I was weak and backsliding, and now the devil has come home! We'll pray, we'll pray, we'll pray! We'll pray for the last time! We'll pray!" | Wal-Mart encourages Shelley to return the DVD player to the store for a full refund. In the meantime, Bettis is now exploring her legal options and also plans to have her daughters see a counselor. |
Yeah, get the kids to a counselor by all means - but have them start by dealing with children raised in such a suffocatingly restrictive, paranoid, and avaricious atmosphere. Frankly, I suspect that the kids didn't see a damned thing. I suspect the mother discovered the disc ( possibly in the DVD player - though just as possibly in her husband's sock drawer), viewed it at her leisure to make sure there was something suitably "disgusting", then started planning her lawsuit, having coached her poor innocents in being traumatized. After all, this is a moral Texas household. I wish her luck - and hope she isn't even awarded costs. If I weren't boycotting Wal-Mart in the first place, I'd be very tempted to go pick up one of these bargain basement DVD players. If the free porn is as good as this psychopathic hag is indicating, that alone would be worth the cost. Tags: moron majority
humour:  very dubious
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Has anyone seen the Superman Returns trailer? Evidently, Warner Brothers is trying to out-Christian The Chronicles of Narnia. | Jor-El Voiceover: Even though you have been raised as a human being, you are not one of them. They could be a great people, Kal-El, if they wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all - their capacity for good - I have sent them you, my only son. |
What. The. Fuck. Wax messianic much? Jesus. And am I misremembering DC Comics or did the planet Krypton not explode with the hapless Kal-El being shot toward Earth in a homemade rocket in the nick of time to save the infant's life? What's with this "light to show them the way" and the whole "I have sent them you" bullshit? Ah, well. I guess this is the kind of Messiah the Christian right has been yearning for. Something tells me they'll be much happier with a crime-fighter that's more powerful than a locomotive and faster than a speeding bullet than they've been with that faggy, bread-sharing, turn-the-other-cheek, love-your-neighbor girly man their religion is named after. But rather than Superman Returns, shouldn't they be calling this Superman: The Second Coming?  Tags: moron majority, movie madness, photo/graphic
humour:  confused
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It looks like Wayne Lapierre, CEO of the National Rifle Association and board member of the American Association of Political Consultants, has joined the ranks of such legendary conservative hypocrites as Senior Bush Advisor Karl Rove, Assistant Secretary of Commerce Israel Hernandez, RNC Chairman Ken Mehlman, RNC CFO Jay Banning, RNC National Field Director Dan Gurley, National Republican Senatorial Committee Director Jay Timmons, Representatives Ed Schrock of Virginia, David Drier of California, James McCrery of Louisiana, and Mark Foley of Florida, Robert Traynham (Rick Santorum's Director of Communication), Dirk Smith (CFO of Trent Lott's New Republican Majority Fund), Jeff Berkowitz (President Bush's liaison to the Jewish community), Fox News correspondent Shephard Smith, wingnut columnist Armstrong Williams, media whore Jimmy Jeff Guckert-Gannon, and headline writer Matt Drudge. Yes, apparently, Wayne Lapierre is queer. Several days ago, this post appeared at BlondeSense: http://blondesense.blogspot.com/2005/11/i-dont-care-where.html
Monday, November 7
I don't care where a person's compass may point them.
But, it does bother me when someone is a hypocrite in the political arena. The executive officer of the National Rifle Association, Wayne Lapierre, is currently endorsing Jerry Kilgore for governor of Virginia in media ads saying Kilgore stands for the same family values that Wayne had as a child growing up in Roanoke. Well, while Wayne Lapierre was in high school in Roanoke (Patrick Henry High School class of '67) he was my brother's lover. Their affair lasted past graduation and on during the anti Vietnam war protest marches they attended in 1969. Not only is Wayne Lapierre gay (not that there's anything wrong with that) but he marched in protest to the Vietnam war. Now he's touting his high ground morality and family values. That I have a problem with.
Archie Gordon
Roanoke, VA
write to me at blondesense(@)optonline.net for the contact information
Posted by BlondeSense Liz 9:19 AM Discussion thread (20) Trackback (0) |
The post has since mysteriously disappeared. The work of the NRA's legal team? Sorry, NRA's legal team - welcome to teh internets. I suppose we shouldn't really be surprised. "Wayne Lapierre", after all, sounds like the name of an interior decorator from a Doris Day movie. But what, one wonders, will we be prying from Lapierre's cold dead hands? 
Jonathan Tolman, Assistant to Senator James Inhofe on
the Senate Committee on Environment and Public Works,
from Metro Weekly's "Coverboy Confidential", May 2001These guys should really form a club. Oh, wait - they have. It's called Our Fucking Government. Tags: moron majority, photo/graphic, political diversion, queerness, teh internets
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terrified
horrified